Stop the madness!

Written on May 25, 2012 by Kaarina in Blogging, Motivational and Inspirational, Musings

frustratedToday, I do not want to hear about, learn about or think about updates or improvements to yet another “social media” tool or platform. (And yes, I know many of  you don’t call them “tools”, but I’m feeling particularly snarky about them today, so that’s what I’m gonna’ call them)

If I hear one more thing about Edgerank or Facebook promoted posts or Instagram’s rival or the newest-best-shiniest-fabyooloso “thing”, I’m really going to lose it.

Now, you might say it’s hypocritical to be calling out “social media tools” while using social media, but quite frankly Scarlett…

Perhaps it’s my age. Maybe it’s my state of mind. I think it might be because I’m a Renaissance woman living in a digital age. Whatever the reason, the unrelenting race to the top is giving me possibilities paralysis. With so many options with so little shelf life , it might not be built-in obsolescence, but what’s here today will assuredly be obsolete tomorrow.

I’m no Luddite.

I’m in favour of a Kaizen approach to things.

BUT, in the mad frenzied rush to compete: to one-up, to do it fasterbetterlongerstronger, are we losing something along the way?

Or maybe it’s just me.

I need to step away from the relentless pursuit of learning on the “technical” side, and harken back to what stirs my soul and moves me.

Storytelling.

Writing longhand on ruled paper.

Reading posts that aren’t solely about the newest widget.

It’s all part of the change that I, and this site, will be undergoing, I guess.

Sometimes it’s best to simply return home. Stick to your knitting. Remember what fuels your soul, and what people find most valuable, endearing and captivating about you. To stop worrying about “catching up”, because just when you think you’ve mastered one tip, trick or tool, the whole dam thing changes.

As many would say, it’s up to me to change the channel. If I’m feeling vexed or overwhelmed by it all, it’s up to me to change that. And you’re right.

Or maybe I’m just having a Falcon Lake kind of day.

 

 

  • socialmediadds

    If this is what a Falcon Lake kind of day is, I am totally on board.  What a treat to have Neil serenade me as I re-read your amazing post today @KaarinaDillabough:disqus  This post was powerful…insightful, truthful and rich with mindfulness.  You are listening to your instincts and it sounds as if they have never been stronger.  You go girl.  Do what you do best.  Listen to your instincts and you will never go wrong. 
    YOU are an inspiration!
    xoxox
    Claudia

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Thanks so much @socialmediadds:disqus . Claudia, the writing retreat I took was a real game-changer for me, and although I don’t yet know what the outcome will be, I’m feeling like the path I’m taking is unfolding before me as it should. Thanks for your very kinds words, support and friendship. Cheers! Kaarina

      • http://soulati.com/blog Soulati

         I think you do know the outcome; in fact, you stated it clearly above. No one can tell you what to write; you need to feel it. For me, I do; that’s why I wrote about Camera and Instagram and the Facebook IPO this week.

        I love it, it fuels my sense of strategic business, and I need to remain at the edge to walk the talk with clients. Tiresome? Sure, sometimes. But step away to get some needed chillax, and the mojo comes back.

        You’re sounding seriously frustrated; I hope you find the way soon, Kaarina. It also feels like it’s something in the water…others wondering or wandering, too.

        • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

           We all have our audience(s) @soulati:disqus , and we all have our own individual purpose. To each his own. And yes…many others are wandering and wondering, so perhaps it’s in the water. Or maybe in the air. Whatever the case or cause, it helps to be true to oneself and write what the writing muse elicits from us. Cheers! Kaarina

  • Judy

    Hey Kaarina,

    I hear you! I am particularly aware of what you are saying her because I am married to (and share and office with) @bobwp. He changes themes and adds/subtracts widgets and plugins at the bat of an eye. I just FINALLY learn how to use something and he is suggesting I try this next new thing. You and I share the writer’s heart, I think. I just want to connect with my readers, hang out with them and share ideas back and forth. Indeed, a Renaissance woman.  : )

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       @c59459415208eb26f4b2664f443525c9:disqus , I am so honoured by your words: “you and I share a writer’s heart”…we do indeed. We are kindred spirits/Renaissance women in that regard.

      My challenge now is to present, online, more effectively, what I do…how I help…how I can be of service. The words business coach, consultant, trainer, strategist et. al. don’t quite cut it for me, but they are the words that I’ve used offline for years.

      When someone asks offline, “What do you do?”, I answer, “What do you need done? Because if I can’t help you, I know I can find someone who can.” (Now this comes, of course, after we’ve had a bit of banter)

      But how do I present and package that more effectively online? It’s still a conundrum for me. But I know this for sure: I am a writer, and I must continue to write. How that will all fit together remains to be seen.

      And I LOL because I know of your husband and the wonderful work/posts he does:) I think that’s a magical combination: technical guru and Renaissance writer.

      To continued sharing of the writer’s heart:) Cheers! Kaarina

      • Judy

        Hmm. My avatar isn’t showing up. I’m going to have to figure out how to fix that. See what I MEAN? Another technical issue. (Wonder if it’s because I just switched back to livefyre on my blog.

        When I was still doing copywriting for clients, I recognized that the biz and life coaches I worked with had a particular challenge. Because so many people identify themselves as coaches that it becomes difficult to differentiate oneself from the pack. They needed to describe themselves in terms of the solutions they provide rather than that non-specific title “coach” or “consultant.” Personally, I think the most successful ones have found a niche and in the marketing materials, people instantly recognize what they are about and whether they can help them. Just my opinion. 

        Are you located in Canada, Kaarina? Because of my friend Danny Brown, I pick up on the spelling of “favourite” right away.  : )

        • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

           Your avatar’s AOK @c59459415208eb26f4b2664f443525c9:disqus : showing up just fine:)

          And yes, I’m in Canada…Ontario, actually, and really “just up the road” from Danny Brown. I get razzed for my “Canadian spelling” (are you listening @twitter-34985693:disqus and @TheJackB:disqus ?), and I must admit, it’s a bit of my guilty pleasure to do it:)

          I totally agree. I dislike labels. Always have. But people seem to need/want a label or title. That’s one of the reasons that this blogsite hasn’t yet been updated to most appropriately reflect “what I do”.

          You are so spot on when you say that positioning yourself from a solutions-based, rather than a title-driven stance is best. I used to say, “I’m like alka seltzer: I provide relief. A pat on the back, a kick in the shins, an objective observer, mirror, mentor and muse.” P.S. No infringement on alka seltzer’s TM intended:)

          Still working on it for this site. Any suggestions? Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://www.writerightwords.com/ Erin Feldman

    We’re eerily similar in some ways. 

    One of the reasons I don’t write about social media anymore is that it doesn’t “fuel my soul.” Maybe I will have clients who need to know more about social media, but they’ll come to me because I’ve been true to the goals and aims of Write Right not because I’ve been led astray by the latest and greatest thing. If they really, really need a social media plan, well, I’ll direct them to @kmueller62:twitter . I’ve come to think, though, that having a strong content plan in place tends to alleviate some of the social media concerns.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       @ErinFeldman:disqus , I like to provide a smorgasbord of content that resonates with people looking to be the “best me I can be”. (I think I need to credit Betsy Cross for that one)

      My best client is one who realizes that it’s an admission of strength, not weakness, to reach out and get assistance. Someone who realizes that, no matter how good they are at what they do, they can get better, and they want to get better. Someone who is NOT looking for balance in life, but realizes that, by embracing imbalance, the ride is that much richer and rewarding. Someone who needs and wants an accountability partner with a depth and breadth of experience, whose wisdom has been gained through both the school of hard knocks and lifelong learning.

      You know my Mission: To spread Joy
      My mantra: To assist others to be the best they can be, in business and in life. To inspire others to dream…decide2do…do.

      Cheers! Kaarina

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=501456842 Ken Mueller

      Thank you for your comment, Erin! I really appreciate that. For me, I write about the things which are important to my clients which are small businesses and non-profits. I have readers who are in the same business as I am, but that’s not my primary focus. Every post I write is directed at either myself or my clients or both. They generally aren’t reading all the other social media blogs because that’s not their thing. They read things specific to their industry. 

      • http://www.writerightwords.com/ Erin Feldman

        That’s what I’m trying to do with Write Right – write things that are directed at myself or potential clients. We’ll see how successful I am. I don’t think I was very clear with my initial comment here…

    • http://twitter.com/skypulsemedia Howie at Sky Pulse Media

       Wait you write about bacon and Kaarina eats bacon. Yup. I see the similarity!

      • http://www.writerightwords.com/ Erin Feldman

        You’re such a goober. :)

      • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

         Don’t tell anyone @howieatskypulsemedia:disqus , but I rarely eat bacon. Canadian back bacon once in a blue moon, which we don’t have many up here in Canada:)

  • Erica Allison

    Yes! Go Channel Surfing, my friend. Take some photos along the way and write in long hand in your journal about all that you see. ;)
    xoxo

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Thanks @47d58be98d1441a276245024c9457dbf:disqus : I’m flipping channels and picking up my pen:) Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/bdorman264 Bill Dorman

    I hear ya; I’m so far behind the curve in just about everything, including Facebook and Twitter. And it is ironic because I was thinking about it today; I feel I’m well versed enough in most of the major platforms, it’s just a matter of how deep I want to go.

    Instead of looking at it like an elephant, I need to just look at it like one bite at a time. My first two projects are to clean up my lists and ultimately my twitter stream, and figure out buffer which I think is similar to Triberr in it’s ability to promote your community. 

    Let me get these two things done and I will figure out my next project from there. Facebook is easy peasy, but my reluctance with getting too deep is that it is SO visible. If I’m on it too much it looks like I’m goofing off instead of being socially savvy. Twitter is quirky enough not many people want to get too deep with it………:).

    Trust me, as the ‘just show up’ guy, I feel you pain. All I want to have to do is flip the switch and turn it on.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       We’re singing from a similar song sheet, my friend @twitter-34985693:disqus . Right now, I’m trusting my gut, allowing each step to lead to the next, saying what I mean and meaning what I say.

      I purged my email inbox, google reader, reviewed my twitter and fb, and that helped a LOT. I continue to be real and in person when I’m online. The tools for automation just seem to create more work for me, rather than less. I’d rather jump in and out in person, even though I know that might not be the “right” thing to do. It works…for now. So I’m online when I’m on and not when I’m not. Still working through it all, just like you. Should I send any more elephants? Cheers! Snowshoes

  • http://www.thejackb.com/ The JackB

    My next post is supposed to be about where I fit in or don’t. Haven’t come up with the name, but it is something along the lines of “who is in my tribe?”

    I am lost in a funny place right now and I don’t want to focus on any one thing, assuming that I ever did. Some of these conversations are wearing upon my soul because they aren’t feeding it.

    So I understand why and what you are trying to do. Keep going. Keep pushing.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       I will continue to keep going @TheJackB:disqus , and pushing…or pulling haha! (you’ll get the gist of that when you see my comment to you on fb)

      I’m wondering what conversations are wearing on your soul: I’d like to feed it, not extract from it. I look forward to your next post. I’m sensing a “who’s in my boat rowing in the same direction?” or “who’s in my boat floating along with me?” Cheers! Kaarina

      • http://twitter.com/skypulsemedia Howie at Sky Pulse Media

         @TheJackB:disqus I was surprised jack when you wrote that post about people shutting up and a list of other posts with Shut Up were listed go back almost 10 years! So you have been putting up with this crap a long time. I give you a lot of credit for endurance!

        • http://www.thejackb.com/ The JackB

          Howie,

          If there is one thing that can be said about me it is that I have exceptional endurance. When I bear down for the long haul I mean it.

          Of course one could also accuse me of being the poster child for the definition of insanity so…

  • http://www.ramblingsofawahm.com/ AllieRambles

    I am with ya!  I feel so complete as a person when I reconnect with all the offline activities I do love- being with my family, exercise, crochet, hiking, biking, reading.  I can clear my mind.  Funny thing is, I feel old fashion when I do that.  But who cares, I find my center and that is what matters.

    ~Allie

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Funny that @AllieRambles:disqus , I was actually going to use the term “old fashioned” in the post, but then I thought…old fashioned from whose perspective? Every generation sees the one before as being old fashioned, so I’d like to say…we’re simply groovy…the ones who scraped our knees, ate dirt, played road hockey (at least I did:), finger painted…wasn’t that just yesterday I did that? Cheers! Kaarina

      • http://www.ramblingsofawahm.com/ AllieRambles

         Lol.  My kids say “in the old days” and are referring to the late 70′s!!  OMG!! I’m not old. LOL.

        I did not eat dirt (lol), I did make mud pies.  And I still scrap my knees and elbows.  If given the chance I will finger paint. :-)   So, for me, it was just yesterday. LOL.  But honestly, it was just yesterday for me too.

        ~Allie

        • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

           @AllieRambles:disqus , I’m not even gonna’ share what “the old days” means to me:) I made mud pies too. Rode my bike without a helmet (that’s me, not the bike:) Roller skated, not bladed. Stayed out after dark playing hide and go seek. Oh, I could go on an on and on…Sing along with me…Yesterday http://youtu.be/5oXPgZjm6Uk

  • http://twitter.com/CrossBetsy Betsy Cross

    My reading and commenting is getting slimmer, but that’s the way it has to be. I’m BUSY! As far as writing long-hand goes, my favorite thing in the world (exaggeration!)  is reading letters in long-hand. Love getting them. They can be works of art as much as a novel or poem.
    As far as learning stuff. I learn when there’s a need. If there’s no need I forget it very quickly.
    What fuels my soul, believe it or not is connecting an ancestor’s story to mine. Actually, it could be a living relative, too. Or a friend or stranger. LOL! I really like people’s stories.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Good for you @twitter-562128902:disqus , to be clear on where you spend your time and energy. You’ve got a good handle on what works for you:) And I love people’s stories too. I made this comment over at Brains on Fire  http://www.brainsonfire.com/blog/2012/05/16/stories-vs-slogans/“Stories are the treasures we share, the fond
      memories we carry, the way in which we communicate most effectively and the
      soul-stirring mental photos we create in the telling and the remembering.”I was moved by the words, but I was moved to tears by the video. I think you’d like it very much Betsy. Take a look: it doesn’t take much time:) Cheers! Kaarina

      • http://twitter.com/CrossBetsy Betsy Cross

        Crying!
         Okay, maybe TMI, but I so needed to see that video this morning! I sometimes stretch at the bathroom sink ’cause it’s almost ballet barre height. And this morning I’m thinking, when am I going to start acting like I believe I can dance again? When am I going to gain the strength to just start? I thought, maybe yoga is a good place to begin.And then I watched that video. I’m not done writing the story of my life. I might be the only one who reads it, but I plan on making it a good read!You are a true gift to me Kaarina! Thank you. Going to look for yoga dvds…Still crying! LOL!

        • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

           @twitter-562128902:disqus , they say that things come to us at moments when we most need them. I’m so happy that you’re crying…well, not really, but you know what I mean. I’m so happy that this found you at a timely moment, and that it inspires you to live that story, write that story and experience your very own story. I’m with you, my friend. Sending positive support, smiles and tears of happiness your way. Cheers! Kaarina

          • http://twitter.com/CrossBetsy Betsy Cross

            HAHA! Guess what? I just got home…I got a yoga DVD! Yeah for me!

          • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

             YAY YAY YAY! I am so proud of and happy for you:)

  • http://www.late-bloomers.net Barbara Klein

    I will come and join you by the fireside with my knitting, if I may. Great post, reine du printemps (soon summer, mhhh, what will it be?), and I have the feeling you know where you are going. 

    I would not call it old fashioned either but re-introducing values and replace marshmallow (sorry for all those you love it, I never did: it is gluey and sickly sweet, sticks to your teeth and fills every apertures you were not even aware of, non-substantial) emptiness with grounding content (read: a healthy down to earth diet, give me a piece of matured cheese, fresh crusty bread and a nice glass of red wine): write, draw, take pictures, reconnect with nature and people.

    Tune in.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       You are a woman after my own heart @BarbaraKlein:disqus :) Bring your knitting:) Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://www.everydaygyaan.com/ Corinne Rodrigues

    Oh yes, I know exactly what you are talking about @twitter-257025239:disqus . It’s so easy to get lost in the maze of the technical information that keeps coming at us and forget about why we started blogging – to express our unique selves. Thank you for the reminder. I needed that today. 

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Welcome @CorinneCR:disqus : delighted to meet you, and delighted to provide a timely reminder. Hope you’ll drop by again. I look forward to learning more about you. Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://markharai.com Mark Harai

     Hi Kaarina,

    I feel your frustration.

    My advice; invest more of your time into your work and less time into the tools.

    You already have a growing presence on the social web to get your message out. You already have a community with awesome folks that know you’re awesome too.

    At this point, I believe your work and the impact it has on others is the key to growing your business. Not more tools.

    Have a wonderful weekend Kaarina!

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Ah @markharai:disqus , wise words that I will take to heart. I do feel that I’ve been pulled in the “student” direction, running as fast as I can to learn and stay on top of tools. But you are right. I need to focus on what I do best, continue to engage, encourage and fan the flame that’s within each of us to be the best we can be. More output, less intake: at least for now:) Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/skypulsemedia Howie at Sky Pulse Media

    This stuff DRIVES ME F-N Bonkers! almost as bonkers as when @bdorman264:disqus tells me he landed another client while Sailfish hunting (he uses harpoons) vs a facebook page.

    I notice that aside from celebs most CEOs, CFOs, even CMOs don’t use twitter. I will never connect with them on Facebook. The marketing industry makes money conning people with the ‘you have to do this…NOW…or fall behind’. Oracle just bought Vitrue. Vitrue specializes in facebook brand pages THAT DON’T WORK! A good friend runs Social for a big Video Game Company and has been completely snowed with Vitrue and what they are doing. I am all for listening and customer service but Social Media marketing has no scale for big companies and barely any for small companies.

    Basically everyone wants to game the system looking for cash or suckers with the cash. And the results are not there. I don’t think they ever will be there. @ShellyKramer:disqus posted not long ago new data from ComScore (mobile might be missing) that we spend in the US on average 12 minutes a day using social media networks. Which means why the fuss to get inside those 12 minutes because it isn’t free to do so like they say it is.

    And when I ask for proof in the pudding they show me jello pudding not the real pudding. No one shows sales or data. Just ‘We did this you should praise us’.

    so yes stop the madness and buy some print ads they still work btw ;-)

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Now I know why I like you so much @howieatskypulsemedia:disqus . In the mad scramble to stay ahead of the game by latching onto the newest shiny “squirrel”, I wonder if people remember…or even know, what it feels like to market, interact, communicate WITHOUT the newest shiny object. Does it feel some days like we’re in an arms race?

      “If I knew then what I know now”…A year and a bit ago, when it all seemed so exciting and sensible, I jumped full tilt into being an almost-full-time student of (drum roll please) “social media”. At first, it seemed to all make sense. But now, I really wish I hadn’t heeded the megaphone call of so many “experts” and “gurus”.

      Don’t get me wrong. There’s good advice out there, good things that can be used, but now, it feels like little can get accomplished because what was new today is gone tomorrow, replaced by something that requires a whole new learning curve. I thought my clients needed me to know this. What I’ve learned? My clients benefit from my expertise, wisdom, common sense, support, perspective, research skills and, for lack of a better word, “coaching”. My integrated approach, not a shiny tools approach.

      So I’m on board with stopping the madness, and getting back to doing what I do best, rather than thinking I have to “know it all” in terms of the changing tools. My clients want results. I want results. I’m changing channels. Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/rdopping Ralph Dopping

    Two words: No Shit!
    Two more words: Be yourself!
    Two more words: Who cares!
    Two more words: Amen sister!

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      @twitter-229922134:disqus  , I like your style:) I made it into a haiku –

      No shit be yourself
      Two more words who cares really
      Yes, Amen sister

      What do you think? Maybe not the best but it is a haiku that you inspired me to write:) Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://www.vidyasury.com/ Vidya Sury

    Hmm. So how about a giant hug followed by a coffee (you choose your bev) by the lake early in the morning followed by appetizing aromas in the kitchen followed by breakfast and followed by ….. your turn. :D   I often feel the strain too, as you described.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Ah @vidyasury:disqus , that scene sounds superb (or maybe I should have saved that for next week’s “S” alphabet post, haha)

      followed by…writing. That sounds like just the ticket to a wonderful day. Cheers! Kaarina P.S. I’ll take the giant hug and cup of coffee anytime:)

  • Ruth

    Today is the first time I’ve read your blog.  I’m truly thrilled to find you.  ” And yes…many others are wandering and wondering, so perhaps it’s in
    the water. Or maybe in the air. Whatever the case or cause, it helps to
    be true to oneself and write what the writing muse elicits from us.
    Cheers! Kaarina

    That statement so applies to me right now.  I’m just getting started and the confusion is overwhelming as I try to get and learn how to use all the bright, new shiny objects.  I am of the “keep it simple” and “from the heart” school.  Thank you so much for posting this. 
    Ruth

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Welcome, Welcome  Ruth! Delighted that you found me, my blog and this great community. You are very wise to keep it simple and listen to your heart. I wish I’d done more of that from the outset. But that’s the beauty of sharing. We get to learn from others what’s worked for them, and to know that, trying to keep up with the never-ending race of technology can be a dizzying ride on a gerbil wheel.

      Disqus seems to be a bit sketchy today, as I’ve tried to tag your name in this reply, to no avail. I’ll cross my fingers that you come back to see this response:) And that you’ll come back regularly. Feel free to ask questions: you can certainly email me if you’d like to chat about where you’re at and where you’re going.

      I’m curious: how did you find me?

      Wishing you a wonderful start, and welcome! Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/ExtremelyAvg Brian D. Meeks

    I didn’t know what it was called, but now I do. I love the phrase “Possibility Paralysis”. I’ve done nothing, today, in part, because of all the things I have to do. If I could start on just one thing, I might get going, but I’m stuck.

    I guess I’ll try to write a bit, and if it is good, add “writing” to my list and then cross it off.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       I am confounded and confronted with “possibilities paralysis” in many things in life @twitter-103512565:disqus . Sometimes that’s great, when I’m looking at all the things I can do, with joy. Sometimes it’s a bummer, when things change so fast that no matter which direction you turn, it’s a Uturn, haha!

      No try: just do. Write, my friend, write! GREAT to see you here. Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://www.johnakerson.com JohnAkerson

    Amen. 
    The information revolution is chewing its participants up… If Jacques-Louis David were around today to update “The Death of Merat” – there’d be an Ipad in his hand pulling up a jobs report, a stock ticker, email, twitter, facebook, a laptop in the background showing Merat’s wikipedia entry, imdb entry, and a smartphone blaring a podcast of his obituary with a link to his critics discussing it on Google Plus…

    maybe I should have stopped at “Amen.”

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

       Amen @johnakerson:disqus …but I’m glad you didn’t stop at Amen:) I’m LOL at the concept. Cheers! Kaarina