When your plate is full to overflowing

This has been a crazy few weeks.

I ran my first 5K race on Labor Day, and surpassed my goal of finishing in 45 minutes: official time, 37:10. Yay!

I was rattled by bad news that resurrected bad memories that, like a shroud, I just couldn’t shake.

I found myself spinning in circles as I strove to read the insane number of blogs I have on my reader, while crafting comments that would provide value.

I yearned to be there for friends and family who, they themselves, were going through rough patches and challenges.

My plate is full to overflowing.

And then I read a post by Betsy Cross that underscored the point for me that; there are no coincidences in life, and things happen for a reason.

You see, in order to keep things on your plate when it’s already full to overflowing, something has to go. And today I’m making some decisions on what will stay and what will go. It’s kind of like clearing clutter in a house. (Is that why I’m having a garage sale this weekend? Hmmmm)  I will reevaluate and keep what is useful, meaningful, important and significant. I will release the things that need to be released.

In business and in life, it’s important to periodically do this kind of pulse check. Take a good, hard look at what you’re doing, what you’re keeping and what you’re seeking, and critically evaluate what should stay and what should go.

What will you let go of today?

 

  • Anonymous

    Uh oh, do I need to bring my play book with me?

    I was going to do a garage sale post too……….brilliant minds……..

    I’m walking out the door, but will be back. 

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      The door’s always open, my friend. Synchronistic garage sales?…hmmm  And remember your play book:) Cheers! Kaarina

      • Anonymous

        If you follow American football, now is the time they are cutting down to their final roster. When you get the word the coach wants to see you, and oh by the way bring your playbook, means you did not make the cut; the team.

        I hear ya, I haven’t been able to keep up with posts lately in my reader and I want to support tribe mates too, but not every one is supporting me so where do you make the cuts?

        Given the fact that if who I hang with now isn’t supporting me, they never will. I’m ok with not being their ‘cup of tea’. I don’t think my style will change much, and the same token I don’t expect their tastes to change either. So given that premise, when I cut down to my final roster some cuts will be obvious and some will be tinged with sadness.

        However, I’m past looking for validation. If someone wants to say their blessings over me, bless away. If some want to avoid me, avoid away. I’m just trying to have fun and grow in this journey and can’t worry about who is doing what. One thing I can be, is myself.

        I am stating this in a total neutral context and it’s entirely up to me to figure out who I want to hang with. Some will come, some won’t; some will go, some new ones will arrive. 

        Probably just need to create some storage space before the winter, huh? 

        • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

          Hey, I’m just pulling your leg, my friend (plus, I’m not a football fan, so I thought bringing the play book meant you were “special” and got in on some special plays…my bad)

          You’ll always make my team, Bill, and I hope to be on yours. And I wouldn’t want to see you change your style. Your style is what draws people to you, online and, I’m sure, offline as well.  You are always yourself, and that’s what we luv about you.

          You already have a huge following of fans, followers and friends, and I know you’re admired for your ability to be “everywhere”, with humorous, entertaining and thoughtful comments on others’ blogs, and your own blog posts. Don’t know how you do it!

          I also admire the fact that you’re so secure in not worrying about “who is doing what”. As you know, I still am perplexed sometimes about the nature of friends, connections and community online.

          So to clarify: DO NOT bring the play book – I want you on my team:) Cheers! Kaarina P.S. Thanks for teaching me about that today.  I woulda’ thought bringing a play book was a good thing, but I get it now.

          • Anonymous

            Hey, look who is out and about………http://www.craigmcbreen.com/

          • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

            Just got a tweet from him: heading over now

          • http://www.craigmcbreen.com/ Craig McBreen

            Thanks again for stopping by :)

          • http://www.craigmcbreen.com/ Craig McBreen

            Finally, eh? You kept pushin’ and proddin’ so I had to shake you off somehow :)

        • http://www.craigmcbreen.com/ Craig McBreen

          As I said below, I’m just glad I’m on team Kaarina … and team Bill! You go, people!! Wait a minute, are we choosing teams? :) :)

  • http://twitter.com/BetsyKCross Betsy Cross

    Wow! You are fast and focused! I ;laughed when I saw the picture of the plate of food. I almost put one that I found of lobsters, etc! 
    Kaarina, I needed this feedback today of all days. It really is about seeing things clearly and making decisions that work for you and what you’re up to, AND being the person who has the time and energy to serve others!  
    My online “world view” was distorted. I was overwhelmed thinking that I had limitless energy and time to connect the way that’s most meaningful for me. I thought that everyone would want that, too. Turns out that there really are very few at one time in my life that want that. The rest enjoy a surface version of me and what I can give them. And now I’m okay with that.
    Thanks Kaarina!
    Betsy

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Betsy, as soon as I read your post today, I tucked away the one I was working on and, with inspiration from you and my writing muse, changed direction. And I’m glad I did. This one flowed out of me without hesitation.

      I had written a comment over at Jay Baer’s place that asked: if the online world disappeared tomorrow, who would you miss? What would you regret? What would your world look like? That, as well as some things I’ve been ruminating about, some successes I’ve had and, of course, the synchronicity of the universe have made me stop…take stock…and realize…

      “This above all, to thine own self be true.” This is the quote that my mother told me at a very early age, and now, more than ever, it’s what I will focus on.

      Thanks for the inspiration Betsy, and I’m glad this post resonated as much with you as yours did with me:)  Cheers!  Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/lifeforinstance Life, for instance

    Hi Kaarina,
    Congratulations on your time in the 5K! And sorry about the bad news and rough patches of your friends and family. I can relate completely – it’s like I’m weaving through good news and bad news and trying to stay positive and compassionate and helpful all at once!

    I find September to be a great month to get organized and to clutter clear your life! I find the energy is higher and my motivation crystal clear! Out with the old, as they say!
    What will I let go of today? Doubt, procrastination, for starters! I’m going full steam ahead, no matter what else happens around me and no matter how much there is on my plate. 
    ;-)
    Lori

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Here’s to getting rid of doubt and procrastination!!!  And may I say, let’s remove that little word “trying” (Yoda: do or do not, there is no try:), and simply agree that you will stay positive, helpful and compassionate. After all, Lori, that’s just the kind of person you are:) Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/ShakirahDawud T. Shakirah Dawud

    Thanks for lifting the burden of guilt–I mean reminding us of our limitations, Kaarina. Having already run myself into the ground last year, I’m being very careful not to overtax myself this year. That means when I get behind I catch up only on the important things. So much less to worry about, and I’m glad you’re doing the same, in keeping with the practicality I’ve always enjoyed here.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Thanks for that Shakirah:) And I’m jazzed to keep providing practical tidbits of food for thought. Not an overflowing, overburdened buffet table, but bits and bites of thought that can be chewed, one bite at a time. Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://www.allisondevelopmentgroup.com Erica Allison

    Love the thought process here and have been doing my own inventory and catch and release program lately. It’s all about taking back my power and not letting extraneous things, issues, concerns, or even people, take it away from me.  Love the clarity that comes from such a process! Great reminder, Kaarina!  Yay on the 5k! Great time and I knew you could do it!!

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Thanks Allison: the 5K was everything and more than I’d planned, in terms of results.

      Ooohhh, I LOVE your “catch and release program”: I believe I detect a potential blog post in that for you.

      As you know from our discussions, we’ve both been undertaking a tweaking and pruning of our business plans and models, and it’s been so great to have your support and perspective.

      Power on, my friend! Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://www.grownupnowwhat.com Tammy

    Another insightful post, Kaarina!

    Due to an injury that has kept me off the dance floor, I’ve found myself with a surplus of time this year (dance in years past had been 15-20 hours a week). Trying not to fill the time with … well, filler has been a challenge. Selecting truly important-to-me activities has had me also having to filter options, while still maintaining a willingness to try new things.

    I’m facing a move in my future, so I also have been viewing my life activities in terms of a physical clutter reduction.  Great minds think alike!!!

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      To great minds! Tammy, I’m glad to hear that we’re on the same wavelength…clearing the clutter, both mental and physical, is so liberating. Glad to hear that you’re filtering your options while still experiencing new things.

      And BTW…I LOVE your tagline on your blog: “Searching for Direction and Purpose in Life’s Sea of Opportunities”…awesome!

      Hope the injury has healed.  Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/AmeenaFalchetto Ameena Falchetto

    Wow … I feel like letting go of at least 50% of the projects I am trying to get done right now. I wonder if it’s September! I started this week full of energy and now I NEED the weekend.
    Thought provoking as always! 

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Thanks Ameena. It’s true that we can get so caught up in all that needs to get done that we sometimes don’t take the time to ask: are these really a priority? Are they must do’s, need to do’s, want to do’s or nice to do’s?

      When our plate is full to overflowing with “must do’s” I would suggest that we’ve taken on too much, all at the same time.  We’re then busy putting out fires, instead of preventing the flames in the first place.

      Recharge your batteries, my friend, and perhaps remove a few things from that plate of yours:) Cheers! Kaarina

  • Al

    Another good one, Kaarina.  I would expect nothing less from you, now.  Good luck with all you have going on.  Stay grateful, humble, passionate and positive.  It will all work out.

    For me, the key word is Balance.  I need to find that balance with all this new stuff I am doing.  (Almost said TRYing to do).  I will continue to work on it.  With all the great advice and support i am receiving from people like you, Lori, JK, Marcus, Erica, Betsy (and even Bill) I’m sure I will get there, eventually.

    I think things happen for a reason and people come into your life for a reason.  Whats funny is that it never seems to be for the reason WE think it is.  It really feels good to just accept people for who they are.  I will continue to work on that, too.

    Thanks Kaarina.  You are a special person.  Luv ya.

    Al

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Luv ya right back Al:) Hopefully this post wasn’t too doom and gloom. It’s not like I’m leaving the country or divesting myself of all friends and possessions. It’s just that, with some experience online now behind me, I’ve got the opportunity to reflect on what’s working and what’s not. And as @bdorman264:disqus says “some will come, some won’t; some will go”. I just know that when you try too hard at anything, there comes a time to pause , reflect and re-group. I hope this post simply inspires others to take that pause. Cheers!  Kaarina

    • http://www.thejackb.com/ The JackB

      Al, I can’t help myself and have to share that I am letting go of SEC football. I need a real conference to follow and those guys aren’t it. ;)

    • http://www.thejackb.com/ The JackB

      Al, I can’t help myself and have to share that I am letting go of SEC football. I need a real conference to follow and those guys aren’t it. ;)

  • http://twitter.com/ExtremelyAvg Brian D. Meeks

    I am feeling overwhelmed myself too.  I need to do some plate cleaning too, but I don’t know where to begin.  I guess the first step is admitting I have a problem.  Good post.  Well done on the race.  :-)

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Thanks Brian: so kind of you.

      And about the plate cleaning…just begin somewhere, with just one thing, and complete that one thing.

      There was a great post about the true cost of multitasking today at  http://om.ly/BcSmB  (and you know I don’t believe in multitasking!!), where it was said that one of the biggest problems and stressors is starting something, shifting to something else, back and forth/back and forth like windshield wipers.

      So to truly get over the overwhelm, and to clean off your plate, start with something…one thing…and complete it. And I’ll bring the potscrubbers and dishsoap, haha! Cheers! Kaarina

  • http://twitter.com/TranscripESvcs Alicia M. Jay

    This post couldn’t have come at a better time! There is lots going on in my personal life and in the lives of my friends all at the same time. I’m the one everyone goes to for support and encouragement. Sometimes it’s hard to stay positive for others when you need it for yourself, too! Out with the bad, in with the good…

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      I so relate to that, Alicia, and there does indeed seem to be “something in the air” that is causing strife, turbulence and unsettlement. Just be sure that you reach out to those around you for support and friendship, and don’t take the weight of the world alone, on your own shoulders.

      Find those safe havens and sheltered harbors of friendship to support you. Whenever you need a dose of “positive”, just come find me! Cheers! Kaarina

      • http://twitter.com/TranscripESvcs Alicia M. Jay

        Yes, I do have those close friends who tell me that I can lean on them because I need it, too. I really need to just take them up on that and stop feeling guilty for unloading on them! Thank you so much for the kind words!!

        • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

          Just remember the lyrics to “lean on me…when you’re not strong…and I’ll be your friend…I’ll help you carry on”. Never feel that you’re burdening someone who has offered their support: that’s true friendship:)

  • http://twitter.com/adamtoporek Adam Toporek

    Ah Kaarina, I am glad you are letting go of the clutter! I’m in a bit of a different place right now, as there is not a whole lot I can cut. So I guess I’ll have to just  power through until I get caught up. :)

    Congrats again on the 5k and on doing your “pulse check”!

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Thanks Adam: keep powering on:)

  • http://www.thejackb.com/ The JackB

    I think that I am going to let go of some freelance work that takes too much energy. The money is ok, but what it takes out of me isn’t.

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Jack, you are so wise. That which extracts more than it gives depletes us mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually, and no amount of money can make up for that.

  • http://www.craigmcbreen.com/ Craig McBreen

    Hi Kaarina,

    First of all, congratulations on the 5K time. Yowza! 37:10 is something to be proud of. I love surpassing goals like this to, it’s quite a rush.

    Love the photo here too :)

    Certainly understand the plate full to overflowing stresses you are encountering. With my new social media goals, I have not been able to keep up with all I see on my Google home page. Visiting other blogs is a priority and I no longer have the excuse of, “I’m working on my  blog” because it’s finally in the can! No more excuses I say, but how to cull those lists and support the right people as I go? My first priority is to support those who support me, and offer me great advice and help along the way, like one Kaarina Dillabough!

    If we are choosing teams, I’m glad I’m on yours.

    I like what you are saying and I think you know that I’m in a similar position. I’m thinking more of a career transition and hopefully the blog is the right medium to get this party started! I’m thinking of slowly letting things go. Kind of a soft career transition, hopefully it’s not a bumpy ride but it’ll be fun, I know. My wife is my biggest supporter and just says do what makes you happy … and puts food on the table ;)

    You always have so much to offer in your great writing. And it’s posts like this one that remind me what I need to do. Okay, I’m gettin’ busy.

    And thanks for stopping by my humble little joint yesterday. I really appreciate the support!

    Be back soon!

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Craig, your first blog post rocked the house! You should be very proud: you’ve gotten off to an amazing start.  Just keep following your heart, write when inspired and realize that this whole online world is a wild ‘n crazy ride.

      I think there will always be times when it’s wise to slow down, reevaluate what you’re doing and adjust as you go. I know that my own blog has suffered when I’ve spent more time reading and commenting on others’ blogs, but I LOVE to read the great posts being produced by so many wonderful people.  So it’s simply time to decide, prioritize, and do.

      Thanks for dropping by: your “humble little joint” is much more than that, and I’ll look forward to being a regular visitor.  Cheers! Kaarina

      • http://www.craigmcbreen.com/ Craig McBreen

        Kaarina,

        Believe me, it was a very pleasant surprise, and thanks again for stopping by. Yes it does seem to be on the crazy, but fun side (this blogging trip) and a true balancing act. There may be a few people out there who have it mastered, and they’ve all written books, right? :)

        Glad you think it’s more than a “humble little joint.” over here at the homestead. I’d say YOUR comments rocked and made my day!

        Craig

        • http://www.kaarinadillabough.com Kaarina Dillabough

          So glad to hear that: I’ll be rockin’ your house regularly:) Just keep doing what you’re doing. You’ve got a knack for writing, and a quick sharp wit. Rock on! Cheers! Kaarina

          • http://www.craigmcbreen.com/ Craig McBreen

            By the way, I printed this out immediately so I could show it to my wife. The quick, sharp wit got the eye-roll ;) Thanks!

          • http://www.kaarinadillabough.com Kaarina Dillabough

            You are making me LOL Craig:)

    • http://twitter.com/TranscripESvcs Alicia M. Jay

      Craig, I enjoyed your comment so much here that I’m going to check out your blog:)

      • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

        Alicia, you’re gonna love Craig’s blog!

      • http://www.craigmcbreen.com/ Craig McBreen

        Alicia,

        Hey there and thanks for your comments! Now for me to get over to your place and find out if my business smells like a stinky diaper :)

  • http://twitter.com/ConnieMcKnight Connie McKnight

    Kaarina,
    Congratualations on you first 5K race – great time!

    Our minds become too active when our plate is full and you’re so right, we need to stop and re-evaluate where we’re going and what our values are. Sometimes we’re doing things out of habit and they are no longer in line with our purpose and goals.

    Thanks for the reminder. It’s time for me to stop and take a breath.

    Connie

    • http://twitter.com/KDillabough Kaarina Dillabough

      Take time to take that breath, Connie. You are so right: “sometimes we’re doing things out of habit and they are no longer in line with our purpose and goals”. What a great reminder to keep our actions aligned with our goals! Cheers! Kaarina

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  • http://twitter.com/kbkcomm Katie Fassl

    Hi Kaarina,
    Long time no talk :).  Congrats on the 5K– I’m a runner, myself, and love the heck out of races.  Such a feeling of accomplishment :).

    This post is such a great reminder.  Sometimes I have to stop myself, as I try to be all things to all people.  The problem with that is the most important people in my life (my family!) are usually the ones to suffer.  I, too, believe that everything in life happens for a reason.  I also believe that there are no do-overs :).  As morbid as it sounds, at times, I find myself thinking about what people will say at my funeral (hopefully, a day that is far, far off).  If they have nothing to say about who I was, and what kind of an impact I made on them, then I will have failed.

    • http://www.kaarinadillabough.com Kaarina Dillabough

      Wow, talk about a thought-provoking comment Katie:) Great to see you here!

      “When we try to please everyone, no one is pleased.” That applies in business and in life. So it’s important not to spread yourself too thin, and to remember that “family first” is a good motto.

      Interesting perspective on the “what people will say at my funeral”. I think we all yearn to leave a legacy of some kind, and to be remembered for the person we are, as opposed to the things we did. Can’t see you failing:) Cheers! Kaarina

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